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ACT I
AT RISE: JULIA is dressed in a white
lab coat and stands looking thru her
telescope into the heavens and taking
copious notes.
note: all hand props appear as if
waiting to be used
JULIA
The stars keep moving in their orbits the force of attraction
still keeping them apart. Look! There's M22. Definitely
closer to us than any other globular in the Northern Sky. But
we are like cannibals, no closer to one another than -
(LEO appears behind her briefly)
Oh, Leo! Damn it! I could have sworn I heard him, felt his
breath here on the back of my neck.
(continues as if nothing has happened)
ETA Sagitarii is 2 1/2 degrees from the bright star Epsilon
computed at a distance of about 90 light years. Actual
luminosity is 40 times that of our sun. Actual luminosity is
whatever reflects it.
(looks around again for LEO -- then continues in
a grand balletic style a la Martha Graham)
We are bound to earth rooted like trees spread green with
leaves.
(dancing)
Only in the fall when the sugar moves down the stems do we
see their true colors - and then, they're gone.
(shooting an imaginary gun)
POW! POW! POW!
(writing in her notebook)
Winter comes and pricks our skin da-da da-da da-da...agin....
Damn stupid idea - rhyming - man's work.
(JULIA continues)
What is our nature?
If you want to see into it, see into it directly. If you
begin to think about it, It's altogether lost.
(doorbell rings. Ecstatically)
Mail call!
(running to the door, JULIA takes off her lab
coat revealing a house dress and fluffy apron)
Do you really know anyone who doesn't love the mailman?
(opens the door to reveal a tired MAILMAN in his
blue uniform)
Darling! You look perfectly exhausted.
MAILMAN
(dragging himself in and handing her mail as he
drops into a big easy chair)
Your male.
JULIA
(singing) Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!
My favorite part of the day.
(tossing them out)
Junk. Junk. Junk. Sweepstakes. Insurance. Telephone
disconnect. Gas disconnect. Water disconnect. Electricity
disconnect. Letter from Leo.
MAILMAN
Disconnect.
JULIA
(protectively)
Letter from Leo.
MAILMAN
(jealously)
Leo! Who's Leo?
JULIA
He cares for endangered water in the desert. A most
remarkable young man, even at fifty-five. He feeds baby seals
in the arctic. You'd love him. No thought of self. No self at
all.
(picking up and stroking his big leather pouch)
Beautiful leather pouch you have. Soft like a baby's behind.
Coffee or whiskey?
MAILMAN
I'm on duty.
JULIA
Then whiskey it is!
MAILMAN
I love my job.
JULIA
(pouring his drink, she holds it out of his
reach)
And well you should. My dependable Mercury, son of Zeus,
God's own messenger. Neither rain nor sleet nor nuclear war
shall keep you from your appointed rounds.
MAILMAN
Yeah.
(trying to get his drink from her)
JULIA
(still carried away with her joy)
Guardian of our inside world turned out. Mail forwarded at no
extra cost.
MAILMAN
Here's looking up your old address.
(toasts then gulps it down)
JULIA
Another rotten day, huh?
MAILMAN
Beaten, stamped, spindled, folded and mutilated.
(these lines can be overlapping)
JULIA
I used to bring our mailman iced tea in the summer.
MAILMAN
Children squirt me with hoses.
JULIA
And I just love those little shorts you wear.
MAILMAN
Disgusting - like a little boy.
JULIA
Knee socks and starched shirts.
MAILMAN
Dogs always nipping at my heels, biting me here and here.
JULIA
And hot cocoa in the winter.
MAILMAN
Snowballs knock my hat off.
JULIA
A regular army of joy!
MAILMAN
NO!
JULIA
I just love'em!
MAILMAN
(slamming his bag on the table)
I hate my job.
JULIA
You hate your job? But it can't be as bad as all that?
MAILMAN
It's worse.
JULIA
(sympathetically)
Tell me....please?
MAILMAN
Twenty-two women got divorce papers today. Forty-four
families received no remains of their sons at all. Thirty-
three widows lost their pensions.
JULIA
Oh, no.
MAILMAN
There's more. Sixty-four men lost their jobs when the plant
closed and moved to South America to make cheap rubber baby
buggy bumpers - and everyone got greetings from the
President!
JULIA
That is cruel.
MAILMAN
Same signature. Machine stitched.
JULIA
Nobody blames you. It's enough that you care.
MAILMAN
And the worse part is this!
(dumps his bag and little boxes fall out)
Non-biodegradable soap samples. Pollutants! Killer goo!
Hundreds of 'em. Nobody likes 'em of course, but everyone
uses them because they're free. Free! It's all on my back and
my back is killing me.
JULIA
(rubbing his back)
Now, now, everyone loves the mailman.
MAILMAN
That only makes it worse. To be so loved.
JULIA
So trusted.
MAILMAN
So weak.
JULIA
No.
MAILMAN
Yes.
JULIA
(pushing him to the floor and dancing joyfully to
the table)
No! We shall dump these little soap samples and fill their
boxes with songs of love and resistance.
MAILMAN
Like little Chinese fortune cookies!
JULIA
Sit here.
MAILMAN
Better than horoscopes?
JULIA
Much. Nothing left to chance. I'll write. You fold.
MAILMAN
We'll work all day.
JULIA
And into the night.
MAILMAN
We'll throw caution to the wind.
JULIA
We'll work 'til we drop and blood runs from our eyes.
MAILMAN
This is so exciting.
JULIA
(writing like automatic writing)
Here's one for the little men who work on the docks... stiff
pudgy fingers frozen to the ropes. And these are for the
orphans on Chestnut and Main with no one to stroke their dear
faces at night. Sweet dreams in small packages.
MAILMAN
My back feels better already.
JULIA
Here's some for the widows on Sansom Street... and more for
the lonely rich who live on the hill... We'll move their
hearts and change their lives. Lonely young men and women
with no one to love...
(growing very excited)
We'll tell them we're here. We'll tell them we care. In each
and every box a labor of love. The promise of spring. Yes!
Promises of spring.
(JULIA runs over, picks up her bridal veil,
takes a broccoli " bouquet " out of the
refrigerator and begins to walk like a bride)
MAILMAN
And I'll deliver.
JULIA
(singing)
"Oh, promise me that someday you and I."
MAILMAN
Julia? Do we want them all folded this way?
JULIA
Don't interrupt me, damn it! Not before I get to the end.
That's the problem today, everyone interrupts before they
know how it will end.
(singing again)
"Oh, promise me that someday you and I."
MAILMAN
(joining in as a duet a la Nelson Eddy/ Jeanette
MacDonald)
"You and I."
JULIA
(louder)
"We'll take our love together to some sky."
MAILMAN
"To some sky."
JULIA
( throwing him annoyed looks)
"Where we can be alone and faith renew."
MAILMAN
"Faith renew."
JULIA
"And find the hollows where those flowers grew."
MAILMAN
(enraptured)
Just me and you.......
JULIA
(Staring at him)
Are you finished?
MAILMAN
Oh yes.
JULIA
(overbearing)
Completely finished?
MAILMAN
Ah.....(flustered) no...yes, I mean....of course.
JULIA
Then why are you staring at me?
MAILMAN
I just thought...you know...(singing timidly) "Me and you.."
(JULIA glares)
Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I've made a mistake.
(starts to gather up his little boxes to leave)
JULIA
(ignores MAILMAN and speaks to audience)
When I was a brain surgeon I made a lot of mistakes. But I
was very careful not to damage the sense of smell or taste.
Other functions may fail you or fool you but the smell and
taste of love always linger the longest.
(JULIA takes off her dress revealing a lingerie.
She hands him the dress)
Here. Take this dress and when you're lonely, wear it inside
out.
MAILMAN
But....
JULIA
(pushing him over to the window)
And don't forget to drop off these boxes before you go home.
MAILMAN
How can I ever thank you?
JULIA
Just remember -
(writing in the air as if signing a document)
"Always ...Julia!
MAILMAN
I'll never forget you - always Julia!
(mimicking her signature)
"Always Julia!"
JULIA
(JULIA flips MAILMAN out the window)
Easy to say now, but see how you feel in the morning.
(wipes her hands clean and then pulls LEO'S
letter out of her pocket)
Aaahhhhhhh, the essence of Leo.
(singing)
"Oh, promise me that someday you and I...."
(LEO appears at the window)
Leo? Damn it! I know I smelled him. His taste is here too -
salt water mixed with anchovies.
(shivers)
I'm cold. And hungry. Yes.
(in a small voice)
Leo? Are you hungry, too?
(very seductively)
Wouldn't you like a little bite to eat before we come to
bed??
(pulls out the sofa bed)
I could make us some of those little sweet meats you always
liked. Or puffed pastry cakes? The ones filled with sticky
fruit and warm meat? Or a glass of fresh plum wine to make
you sleepy? Yes, wouldn't that be nice.
(sips her wine and giggles)
Very warm and very sweet.
(gets into bed and combs her hair and brushes her
teeth)
I'm ready now. I've brushed my teeth and combed my hair. I've
put the cat out and settled every little thing.
(sensually) I am yours. (puts the broccoli
bouquet next to her, shuts the light and
thrashes about in the bed moaning until she
screams)
Oh, Leo. No, Leo...yes...now...no...oh, Leo? Yes, yes,
yes.... Leo....ahhhhhhhhhhhLEO!
SOLDIER
(outside)
I'm coming.
(crashes through the window screaming as JULIA
runs to hide.)
JULIA
What the hell?
SOLDIER
(jabs bayonet into the bed wildly and then stops,
reaches down and picks up the mangled broccoli)
Dear sweet Jesus, mother Mary of God. I've turned her into a
vegetable. Oh, no, not again.
JULIA
(flipping on the light)
You dumb shit!
SOLDIER
You're all right!
(drops to his knees in relief)
Praise God!
JULIA
No thanks to you. What do they teach you in this man's army?
SOLDIER
Just to maim and kill and keep the peace, ma'am.
(Holds out the crushed broccoli in peace gesture
offering)
Peace?
JULIA
(taking it from him)
Just kiss and make-up? Is that it? You come in here and shoot
my best broccoli and I'm suppose to just turn the other
cheek? Well, that may be easy for you but I have my pride. I
have my needs. I had a perfectly good broccoli!
SOLDIER
I heard a scream.
JULIA
A scream of pleasure!
(looks to the window)
Now you've frightened him away.
SOLDIER
Who?
JULIA
Leo.
SOLDIER
Sounds foreign.
(jumps around on both feet with his rifle pointed
in different directions as if he is on a "Search
and Destroy" mission)
JULIA
Always Leo.
(he continues)
What are you doing? I'm afraid you have the wrong house. It's
been awfully nice but I'm afraid you'll just have to go now.
SOLDIER
(as if in another time and place)
No real good bad guys. No real bad good guys. No good wars.
No good.
JULIA
(LEO pops out of the wall / Never seen by anyone
but JULIA)
LEO!
SOLDIER
DROP TO THE FLOOR! I'll shoot the sons-of -bitches eyes out!
(crouched in combat position)
JULIA
Oh, Leo, don't leave yet!
SOLDIER
Where is he? Where is HE!
JULIA
Too late. (sadly) He's gone now.
Script created with Final Draft
© 1998 Halem Studios
Last updated September 1998
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